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Meh. I just don't like spam or google cache up in my bidness, other than that... meh...
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I think everyone has that moment when they know they've truly become an adult in their own right, and that was mine for sure.
I don't feel remarkable though... I just feel tired! ;)
You think too much:-(
I don't think so, but thanks anyways.
Blessings to you Dear One. I appreciated reading this account of your experience at the Amma Ashram at San Ramon. It sounds like you attended one of the Devi Bhava sessions during the one or two times a year Amma comes to San Ramon. I have probably been to Devi Bhava 6 or 7 times at this point. I find the experience to be mostly positive. Your very detailed description of your experience was helpful to me. As I was reading, I was laughing out loud because so much of what you described is so close to my experience of Devi Bhava. Perhaps what we both have experienced there is an aspect of Indian culture that is foreign to both of us. Of course there is one significant difference--I consider myself a devotee of Amma's and have nothing but positive regard for both her and the work she does in the world in spite of my very similar experience of Devi Bhava to that which you describe.
And that's OK. In one respect you are more generous than I. You refer to the various volunteers at these events as "attendants." I call them "handlers" and "bullies" because that's how they seem to me. The first time I went to Devi Bhava I was so put off by their behavior and energy, I decided to forgo getting a hug from Amma because I didn't want to be "manhandled" by them--literally! I have that time and almost every time since experienced these people in almost the exact same ways you describe. I wear glasses. The first time I went for a hug one of the handlers grabbed my glasses right off my face and placed them in a basket. From that point on until when I left the platform I was essentially blind. Oy Vey! Still, somehow I've been able to move past all of that to what I believe to be the essential experience of Amma and what she brings to the world and me personally.
I believe the most basic truth here is that everyone experiences spiritual teachers in their own way, a way that is neither right nor wrong but simply is. And I believe it is always correct to follow your instinct and intuition no matter what.
Namaste' and Peace to you Dear One!
Hello Raven- You're quite right! Many paths up the mountain, and all that. :)
It's been a little bit of time since it all happened, and in giving it some thought, it did have a positive end result that helped me with something I've struggled to balance.
I learn from everything I experience, and I'm glad I went for the experience of it! It wasn't perfect, but deliberately putting myself out of my comfort zone yields the best lessons, spiritual and otherwise.
Learning is what matters most. Lesson learned? ;)
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Good to see you posting here again. Welcome back. :)
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